Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Good-bye, Dear Friend

D.J.: June 1990 - October 31, 2006

I said farewell to DJ tonight.

I returned from meetings this afternoon to discover his nasal infection had progressed to bleeding from his nose. There was blood thoughout the house, and lots of it.

I immediately phoned the vet.

They scheduled us for a consult at 5:15 this afternoon. I was hopeful that on consulting the doctors they would suggest we continue with the new anti-biotic, since it had been only three days. Although a veterinary doctor is obligated to suggest all possible options for treatment, we both understood what we were so carefully not saying.

It was time to say good-bye.

The biggest question that ran through my mind was

"How the hell can I in good conscience, play God!?"

Who was to say that he wouldn't bounce back? After all, the treatment was scheduled for 28 days, not 3.

As DJ was sedated, he tried to crawl back into the kennel. He lifted his head as if to say,

"I'm strong, I will make it!"

I stayed with him until he was under the anesthetic. I wonder if it makes me a coward that I didn't stay until the end.

I went to class tonight, probably a good thing too.

I think now is a good time to find comfort in tears.



DJ and Family

12 comments:

ipodmomma said...

I think you did the right thing.... he's up in kitty heaven, chasing all the birds...

and catching them! :)))

Misty said...

If he was that sick, then there was really no other choice. If you didn't say goodbye, then his suffering would have continued. It is never an easy choice.

The importance is that you were able to say goodbye, not whether or not you stayed until the end.

Sorry for your loss!

Anvilcloud said...

I've done that and will have to do it again someday. It's not a good feeling.

Badoozie said...

sorry buddy....i have never had to actually put a pet down before, but i know for a fact, i would have to leave just like you did. and no you're not a coward. your a sensitive man, who loves your cat.

Bast said...

Oh, Turtle, I'm so sorry. It's so difficult. They wind their way into our hearts and then our hearts break when they leave. But you did the right thing. It'll just be difficult for awhile, and that's ok too. Take good care.

sare said...

Awww, what a shame! There is just nothing quite like a furry friend. :(

Granny said...

We've had to do it more than once and I couldn't stay either.

I'm so sorry but I agree with Mollie about a kitty heaven with lots of green grass, their old friends, trees to climb, and best of all no dogs (they have their own).

oshee said...

Oh my turtle..I am so sorry. My heart aches for you.

Sarah Elaine said...

This is why we take photos... To look back fondly and remember.

I will re-iterate what I said via e-mail... I am thinking of you.

DJ was a beautiful creature.

Jamie Dawn said...

Awww, how sad. I'm sorry your dear pet is gone.
I know it was a hard thing to do, but I believe you did the right thing. DJ was a gorgeous cat.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for your loss....I had to take both my childhood pets but I knew it was their time, but it doesn't make it any easier. DJ was a beautiful cat.

Hugs to you.

nolikeysushi said...

A tearful comment today. So sorry to hear about DJ. It a little of a year since I lost Gracie. Maybe they'll meet in the overthere. I hope you are doing okay. He was a very special part of your life and will be missed. I'm very glad to have had the opportunity to meet him and share in a head butt or two.

Know you are in my thoughts,
Cassie

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Calgary, Alberta, Canada
English student, Pottery enthusiast, Yoga novice and lover of all people. I make friends over a warm handshake and a beverage. I discover, every day, someone willing to help me along my path.